“Once again, the precision and quality of a Rolex proves to be a lifesaver in more ways than one.”

Could this be the most ludicrous press release ever?

Melrose Jewelers | Rolex Quality And The Recovery Of Owen Wilson

After a frightening suicide attempt in 2007, Rolex watches and benefits appeared to play an essential role in actor Owen Wilson’s recovery. [...]

Although Owen Wilson has worn a Rolex GMT Master in the popular films Wedding Crashers and The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, he chooses to wear a Rolex Submariner in his everyday life. It is not surprising that he would make such a choice. The Rolex Oyster Perpetual Submariner originally was designed for diving and known for their resistance to water. The first Submariner was introduced to the public in 1954 at the Swiss Watch Fair. Copied by other watchmakers, the Rolex Submariner is recognized as a classic, and one of the most widely recognized luxury products in the world. The Rolex Submariner is part of Rolex’s Oyster Perpetual Professional line. After returning home from the hospital, Owen was captured by a photographer walking on the beach, wearing his Rolex Submariner. Later, he was seen riding his mountain bike in Santa Monica with the Rolex Submariner on his wrist. Obviously, the quality of a Rolex watch helped Owen realize and appreciate the quality of his own life. [...]

Believe me, it gets even better worse sillier after that.¹

[Via Lost in Showbiz]

1. On the off-chance that the text of the press release gets taken down once Melrose Jewelers realise what a colossal blunder it was, I’ve saved off date-stamped PDFs of their blog entry and the MSNBC copy of the press release here and here. Such spectacular idiocy deserves to be preserved for all to see. ^