Not Excel

April 19th, 2014

Spreadsheets, the app:


Spreadsheets \'spred-,-shets\ , verb,:=

  1. Using technology to track sexual performance?
  2. The act of sexual intercourse?

"Spreadsheets and golf are the two things you can enjoy even if you're not good at them." – Kevin Costner (revised)

"Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer Spreadsheets raises some pretty good questions" – Woody Allen (revised)

What is Spreadsheets?

Spreadsheets is a mobile app that monitors your performance in bed to provide statistical and historical feedback. Find out how many thrusts per minute you’re averaging, how long you go for, and exactly how loud it gets. Keep a record of your encounters, date, time, and performance.

How does it work?

Spreadsheets monitors data from user’s movement and audio levels through the accelerometer and microphone to provide statistical and visual analysis of their performance in bed.

Spreadsheets does not record or playback audio or video. That would be creepy. […]

Right. That's where you draw the 'creepy' line.

[Via Extenuating Circumstances]

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