May 2nd, 2009
Marina Hyde on the unholy union of Big Brother and swine flu:
In the meantime, for eagle-eyed Star reporters anxious for an "angle" on the possibility of the biggest global outbreak of sickness and death in four decades, here's a story idea for you to cut and paste into your DaYLee NyooSPaYpA in the coming week: Big Brother bosses are drawing up emergency plans in case the global flu pandemic strikes before this summer's show. The top-secret documents detail what to do if a carrier is accidentally released into the house, and inmates can't bitch about the shopping list or whatever because they're sweating blood. A show chief told the Star: "We have to look at all the options, and right now we are working with leading health authorities on the best course of action. The Big Brother house could either be the safest place in the country – or the deadliest."
That's got you started, newshounds. Get one of your ham-pawed monkeys to fill in the rest.