Tag: Humour


Packages

I’m the Package You Impulse-Ordered Three Days Ago and No, I’m Not Going to Make You Feel Any Better:

It’s hard being a package. Sometimes we’re out in the cold for a really long time. Sometimes someone puts a bomb in us. Sometimes someone thinks there’s a bomb in us, so 90 people in green suits show up and talk to each other on the phone for 11 hours only to discover we’re just a litter of kittens in a duffel bag.

But for a long time, it was worth it to see the smile on your face. […]

So true.1

[Via Memex 1.1]


  1. Next package is due for delivery on Wednesday. As it’s disposable face masks, I can safely predict it was never going to put a smile on my face. 
, 15 March 2021. Category: Uncategorized. Tagged: .

Gruesome

Painful to watch. The horror movie of the year:

[Via RT by @siracusa]

, 22 January 2021. Category: Uncategorized. Tagged: .

Coming soon

Note to readers: do not, under any circumstances, be consuming drinks while you read this tweet.

There I was casually sipping a Diet Coke and scrolling through my Twitter feed, and then my brain processed the content of that message. Cue rapid exhalation of the Coke – much of it through my nose – followed by fifteen minutes of hysterical giggling while trying to remember to breathe occasionally at the notion of Ewan McGregor returning to the Star Wars universe to play "ponytail Derek."

Lockdown, Airfix-style

Dumb joke, nice execution:

[Via MetaFilter]

, 20 December 2020. Category: Uncategorized. Tagged: .

QG: HHH

David Squires shares with the world his take on The Queen’s Gambit: Hungry Hungry Hippos edition:

A popular tabletop game that requires considerable guile and skill

Has to be said, there’s a small part of me that would have really liked to see this.1 And a large part of me that thinks that take on the project might have had a little more difficulty in getting funded by Netflix.


  1. Not least because I suspect Anya Taylor-Joy wouldn’t have batted an eyelid at having to adapt her performance a bit. 
, 16 December 2020. Category: Uncategorized. Tagged: , .

ACME-dunnit

A perfect end to the mystery:

[Via RT by @cstross]

, 7 December 2020. Category: Uncategorized. Tagged: .

Twenty years on

As usual, Paul Ford’s Web Conversations With the Year 2000, says it better than I can:

2000 me: Wow you still work on the web, that’s amazing. It must be so easy to publish really interesting web pages.

2020 me:Uhhhhh. [Very long pause.] Look, you can pay a low monthly fee and listen to any album anyone ever made.

’00:That must create some amazing opportunities for musicians!

’20:Well.

’00:There also must be some really good music discussion forums.

’20:Huh. […]

A small part of me wishes he’d qualified the "listen to any album anyone ever made" line to reflect the realities of music licensing and stuff not making it onto Spotify or Apple Music or whatever Amazon call their variant and so on, but his wider point still holds regardless.

, 29 November 2020. Category: Uncategorized. Tagged: , .

COVID-19 Vaccine SE

The Onion reveals that Pfizer Announces First Batch Of Coronavirus Vaccine Will Be Collector’s Edition Limited To 2,000 Doses:

NEW YORK—Following this week’s news that the immunization may be 90% effective in preventing Covid-19, pharmaceutical giant Pfizer announced in an advertisement Wednesday that the first batch of its highly anticipated coronavirus vaccine would arrive in a collector’s edition limited to 2,000 doses. “Pfizer is proud to offer an exclusive early release of our new vaccine in a custom-made Swarovski crystal syringe with a 24-karat gold needle,” the glossy magazine ad read in part, noting that each dose would come in a handcrafted mahogany case and be accompanied with an official certificate of authenticity signed by Pfizer CEO Albert Bourla. […]

[Via LinkMachineGo!]

, 19 November 2020. Category: Uncategorized. Tagged: .

Joking. Not joking.

Horrifying to contemplate how big a round of applause this would get at the next Conservative Party conference if it was delivered by the right member of the Cabinet:

Reasons not to use Microsoft Teams (number one in a very long list)

My experience of team working from home bears precisely no relationship to this. And yet, I still can’t help but find it entertaining and endearing.

So, well played, Apple’s marketing team. Well played indeed.

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